THE AWAKENING
"are you awake?"
A time comes in your life when you finally get it? When in the midst of
all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere,
the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH!!! Enough fighting and
crying, or struggling to hold on.. And, like a child quieting down
after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or
twice, you blink back your tears and through a mantle of wet lashes,
you begin to look at the world through new eyes.
This is your awakening?
You realize that it's time to stop hoping and waiting for something to
change, or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over
the next horizon. You come to terms with the fact that he is not Prince
Charming and you are not Cinderella and that in the real world, there
aren't always fairy tale endings (or beginnings for that matter) and
that any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin with you and in
the process, a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.
You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone
will always love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are? And
that's OK. (They are entitled to their own views and views and
opinions.) And you learn the importance of loving and championing
yourself and in the process, a sense of newfound confidence is born of
self-approval.
You stop complaining and blaming other people for the things they
did to you (or didn't do for you) and you learn that the only thing you
can really count on is the unexpected. You learn that people don't
always say what they mean or mean what they say and that not everyone
will always be there for you and that it's not always about you. So,
you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself and in the
process, a sense of safety and security is born of self-reliance.
You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept
people as they are and to overlook their shortcomings and human
frailties and in the process, a sense of peace and contentment is born
of forgiveness.
You realize that much of the way you view yourself and the world
around you, is a result of all the messages and opinions that have been
ingrained into your psyche. You begin to sift through all the junk
you've been fed about how you should behave, how you should shop and
what you should drive, how and where you should live and what you
should do for a living, who you should marry and what you should expect
of a marriage, the importance of having and raising children or what
you owe your parents. You learn to open up new worlds and different
points of view. You begin reassessing and redefining who you are and
what you really stand for.
You learn the difference between wanting and needing and you begin
to discard the doctrines and values you've outgrown, or should never
have bought into to begin with and in the process, you learn to go with
your instincts.
You learn that it is truly in giving that we receive and that there
is power and glory in creating and contributing and you stop
maneuvering through life merely as a "consumer""looking for your next
fix.
You learn that principles such as honesty and integrity are not the
outdated ideals of a by gone era, but the mortar that holds together
the foundation upon which you must build a life.
You learn that you don't know everything; it's not your job to save
the world and that you can't teach a pig to sing. You learn to
distinguish between guilt and responsibility and the importance of
setting boundaries and learning to say NO. You learn that the only
cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and that martyrs get
burned at the stake.
Then you learn about love. Romantic love and familial love. How to
love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving and when to walk
away.
You learn not to project your needs or your feelings onto a
relationship. You learn that you will not be more beautiful, more
intelligent, more lovable or important because of the man on your arm
or the child that bears your name.
You learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as
you would have them be. You stop trying to control people, situations
and outcomes.
You learn that just as people grow and change, so it with love; and
you learn that you don't have the right to demand love on your terms,
just to make you happy.
You learn that alone does not mean lonely. You look in the mirror
and come to terms with the fact that you will never be a size 5 or a
perfect 10 and you stop trying to compete with the image inside your
head and agonizing over how you "stack up".
You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing
things over and ignoring your needs. You learn that feelings of
entitlement are perfectly OK and that it is your right, to want things
and to ask for the things that you want and that sometimes it is
necessary to make demands.
You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated with
love, kindness, sensitivity and respect and you won't settle for less.
You allow only the hands of a lover who cherishes you, to glorify you
with his touch and in the process, you internalize the meaning of
self-respect.
And you learn that your body really is your temple. And you begin
to care for it and treat it with respect. You begin eating a balanced
diet, drinking more water and taking more time to exercise. You learn
that fatigue diminishes the spirit and can create doubt and fear. So
you take more time to rest. Just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels
our soul; so you take more time to laugh and to play.
You learn that for the most part in life, you get what you believe
you deserve and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy.
You learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for and
that wishing for something to happen is different from working toward
making it happen.
More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success you
need direction, discipline and perseverance. You also learn that no one
can do it all alone and that it's OK to risk asking for help.
You learn that the only thing you must truly fear is the great
robber baron of all time; FEAR itself. You learn to step right into and
through your fears, because you know that whatever happens you can
handle it and to give in to fear, is to give away the right to live
life on your terms.
You learn to fight for your life and not to squander it living
under a cloud of impending doom. You learn that life isn't always fair,
you don't always get what you think you deserve and that sometimes bad
things happen to unsuspecting, good people. On these occasions, you
learn not to personalize things. You learn that God isn't punishing you
or failing to answer your prayers; it's just life happening.
You learn to deal with evil in its most primal state; the ego. You
learn that negative feelings such as anger, envy and resentment must be
understood and redirected or they will suffocate the life out of you
and poison the universe that surrounds you. You learn to admit when you
are wrong and to build bridges instead of walls.
You learn to be thankfull and to take comfort in many of the simple
things we take for granted; things that millions of people upon the
earth can only dream about; a full refrigerator, clean running water, a
soft warm bed, a long hot shower. Slowly, you begin to take
responsibility for yourself, by yourself and you make yourself a
promise to never betray yourself and to never ever settle for less that
your heart's desire.
You hang a wind chime outside your window so you can listen to the
wind, and you make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting and to
stay open to every wonderful possibility.
Finally, with courage in your heart and with God by your side you
take a stand, you take a deep breath and you begin to design the life
you want to live as best as you can!!
People say everything happens for a reason and God has a Plan for
it all. I believe things do happen for a reason. And God does have a
Plan. But if we don't learn the lesson from the circumstance and let
ourselves completely heal from it -- whether it is the past or today --
the things that happen for a reason will just keep happening over and
over again. And we'll end up on a talk show talking about what keeps
happening to us and wondering why. With the millennium, time is of the
essence. Everything's being magnified. Events can easily feel bigger
than life. This is so we'll look at things, see things, feel things,
correct our path, do what we need to do because everything we do helps
shape the universe and affects everyone around us.
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